Alternatives to the Chnlove Chinese Dating Site

Hi guys - I've written a few articles on hubpages about dating Asian women, so today I want to talk about Chnlove.

I have a fair bit of experience here - I met a girl on Chnlove, and I even went to visit her in China.

Sadly my relationship didn't work out. While our relationship was mostly spoiled by women-related issues rather than anything related to Chnlove or China itself, I am now not so sure that Chnlove is the best place to meet Chinese ladies looking for Western husbands. So what are the alternatives? Find out below!

Here's a quick run through of how you can use Chnlove to find a Chinese wife. Basically you can sign up for free and browse the lady profiles. Each profile has a number of photos, plus a few details of each lady. Once you found a lady you like you can send her a cupid note free of charge. If you want to email a lady you're charged a credit, plus another credit when the lady replies.

Here's where it gets complicated. All of the ladies on the site are represented by Chinese marriage agencies. Many of these agencies have a poor reputation for shady business practices. Agencies such as the Changsha Love Bridge Agency have been amongst the most complained about. It does however need to be borne in mind that this may simply be because it is one of the largest agencies, and the ladies on their books are extremely attractive, hence they attract a lot of male admirers who have recently signed up to Chnlove. I don't know what it is about Changsha and Hunan/Hubei Provinces, but having been there I can confirm that the ladies are the most beautiful in the whole of Asia (and maybe the entire world!) Anyway, I know that Changsha Love Bridge Agency did waste my precious credits by sending me multiple emails from the same lady. I also suspect that one of the ladies I was emailing was actually a translator.

One thing that I will not dispute is that Chnlove has the most attractive women I have ever seen on any dating site. Sadly a lot of the photos have been photoshopped, so the photos are often extremely flattering. I can confirm though that myself and the other men who have visited Chnlove ladies have not been disappointed with our lady's appearance in real life!

You know, I've heard a lot of bad stuff about Chnlove. It's difficult to know if it's all true. There is a lot of competition in the Asian online dating and companies based in Asia find it a lot easier to generate the bad publicity and pull dirty tricks on each other. If Chnlove was based in the UK you can be rest assured that trading standards would be inundated with complaints about scam agencies and ladies.

• Wasting credits - I've been a victim of this (see above).
• Timewasting ladies - Sadly Chinese ladies can change their mind and waste your time, just like ladies in any other country. I guess there's not much Chnlove can do about this.
• Non-existent ladies - There's good evidence that some ladies don't exist. Make sure you see your lady on webcam and that you verify her address by sending her a small gift.
• Lady doesn't turn up to a meeting - This is every man's worst nightmare! Thankfully it's quite rare, but there is some evidence that agencies will use "switch tactics" to provide you with a different lady to see on your visit.
• Lady/agency scams - A few men have visited ladies only to be charged extortionate fees for all kinds of things. Be particularly wary of going shopping or paying for a translator.
• Reappearance of scam ladies - Ladies changing their name or photos; I have personally seen convincing evidence that this has happened.
• Marriage/engagement fees - Men are often charged several thousand dollars by an agency should they get engaged or married to a lady. To this I say: you have no contract with the agency, so don't pay them anything. If a lady signed a contract it is her problem. Please investigate the legalities of your situation, there is anecdotal evidence that agencies are not legally allowed to charge for arranging marriages with Western men. Unfortunately as Western men our chances of understanding the legal system in a country not known for honest business dealings is remote.

If you report a scam then Chnlove will usually refund you some credits. But I've not heard of much being done about rogue agencies, even when they have been supplied with firm evidence of shady practices.

To their credit, I've not heard of many money scam ladies being present on Chnlove like there are on Cherry Blossoms or Match.com.

You must also know that I know of many many men who have found their life partners on Chnlove, so please keep all the negative thoughts in perspective. Something to bear in mind is that relationships with Chnlove women in the 40-50 age group are particularly successful.

I emailed a few single Chinese ladies on Chnlove and went to visit one. I four months I spent $250 on Chnlove credits, so it's clear that a flat rate dating site would have been much better value for me.

Some of my fellow men have met ladies on Cherry Blossoms. It's a big site and has a cheap annual flat rate fee so can work out considerably cheaper than Chnlove. Bear in mind however that any site that allows ladies to join for free is a minefield of scam ladies! I personally complained to Cherry Blossoms about a lady, and while they took her profile down it was back up again the following week. Be on your guard at all times. Funnily enough many Chnlove ladies are also on Cherry Blossoms, but it's much cheaper to date them on Cherry Blossoms!

I like the Cupid Media sites - they have all kinds of niche dating sites that allow you to make contact with Chinese, Japanese or a wide variety of other Asian (and non-Asian ladies). Try Chinese Love links, Asian Dating or Japan Cupid. All of these sites are less marriage orientated than Chnlove so you can find friends or language study partners as well as a wife! Cupid Media charges a fixed monthly or annual fee for each site.

Chinese Kisses is another alternative to Chnlove.

There are plenty of free Chinese dating sites, but these worry me a lot. China Love Match is quite popular with men looking for Chinese wives, but I don't think I would trust this site at all. There are also free Asian dating sites like DateInAsia. DateInAsia is immensely popular (with over one million members) but again the chance of encountering a scammer or timewaster is very high.

Finally there are plenty of lovely Chinese ladies in Hong Kong. Try the Hong Kong Cupid dating site. It's also much easier to visit Hong Kong and a lady from Hong Kong will find it much easier to travel on her passport.

If you haven't got much experience of Asia then an escorted tour of China to meet beautiful ladies looking for Western husbands could be a good option. There are a few companies that offer this service - one of the well established sites is Chinese Brides Online. I don't know how successful these tours would be - I'm always worried that they might just find ladies who will turn up for a drink and a chat with men and they might not necessarily be looking for husbands. If you look for an escorted tour then do a lot of research on your chosen company - these escorted tours can be costly and you don't want to end up wasting money.

An alternative is an introduction agency. For a fixed fee they will help you find a suitable Asian lady for marriage. These are common in Thailand (see Anglo Thai Introductions), and being largely run by Westerners I think I could trust them. Unfortunately I haven't yet found a good introduction agency for Chinese ladies.

This is the route I am now going down! The UK is very multicultural, and with London on my doorstep I am hoping my Asian special somebody will already be much closer to home. This is certainly worth considering and will be a lot less stressful than flying half-way around the world to meet the woman of your dreams.

If you are young then this is a particularly good option as many Chinese study or work overseas these days.

It is also a good option if you are looking for a filipina lady - there are many filipinas working overseas so there doesn't seem to be much point looking for a lady living in the Phillipines, particularly due to the amount of scam ladies now operating out of that country.

Good luck in your search for a loving Asian wife, and remember that plenty of men have found their dream wife on Chnlove, so don't let the scare stories put you off too much!